For Rae and Sinric

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan comes up, entering his own room rather than going straight into the adjoining one that's nominally Sinric's to give him privacy.

With a smile over his shoulder for Rae, he knocks on the door.

"Oriens? Someone would like to see you, may we come in?"

Comments

[thewidewideworld]

Sinric is perched on the narrow window seat, a book open on his knees and the sunlight across his marred face, half hidden by his long gold hair.

"Come." He calls softly, pulling the heavy robe protectively tighter around himself.

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan opens the door at the invitation and slips through.

"Perhaps you remember meeting Rae?"

[thewidewideworld]

"The lady of the sweet ices. How could I forget." He lowers himself from the ledge with care, bowing to her with a painfully suppressed wince. "Welcome to my chambers, m'lady. How may I be of service to you?"

The formality of his speech and movement masks his confusion at Athelstan bringing her here.

[sunbaked_baker]

"If I had been thinking, I would have brought one with me," she tries to smile at Oriens, though she can't help her reaction to his condition showing on her face. He must be in such pain.

"I actually came with Athelstan today," she says, sympathy and care in her tone, "to see if I may be of service to you."

"I have magic," Rae adds, "and I would offer healing if you would want it. It would leave no scars."

Rae is quite obviously tired, her posture poor and her eyes dry, but the offer is genuine.

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan looks to Oriens.

"I told her that you had suffered at Leo's hands", he says softly, "but not in detail."

[thewidewideworld]

He glances from Rae to Athelstan, hesitation in his expression. He worries his lip, unsure how to answer this.

"I would be grateful if your gift could remove the marks that must not be seen." He lowers his eyes in another now. "But I fear I have nothing to pay for such kindness with. My treasures are still in the palace."

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae shakes her head, stepping forward to offer her hands to him. "I wouldn't ask for payment in any case. I value the wellness and happiness of others far more than treasure."

Helping to bring about the ceasing of pain, worry, and fear is payment in itself.

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan watches them.

"It's your choice, my friend, but I know you said you'd like to hear more of magical healing."

[thewidewideworld]

He takes her hand with care, his grip light and weak. "I would like to learn more, if I may, m'lady?" He asks softly. "Can you tell me how it is done, or is it a secret mortals may not know."

[sunbaked_baker]

Her hands are warm, her knuckles and the inner side of the thumbs lightly calloused by the baker's craft. Her hands envelop Oriens' hand, her warm, gentle fingers massaging his palm and along the pads of his fingers.

"As a mere mortal myself, I should think it is a secret I can share, though I'd ask your patience if I don't have an adequate explanation for how it is done," she murmurs. Rae supposes that her scarred figure isn't exactly a comforting sight, when one is offering healing. "Some healing magic speeds up the body's own healing processes. That's very effective, but it often leaves scars. The way I do it... I undo the damage. What happened still happened, but the physical damage is no more. It's less healing than... unchanging something that has been changed."

[athelstanthescribe]

"What happened still happened", Athelstan murmurs sadly. "But it can be healed from."

[thewidewideworld]

He shakes his head, hiding his face behind his hair. "What has been done can't be undone, not until I am undone." There's a tremble in his voice and he shrinks back a touch.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae lets him pull back, her hands opening should he want to step away from her. "I can't... undo what's been done, and I can't erase the memories of it, but I can erase the physical evidence of it. It will not be there to remind you."

[athelstanthescribe]

"And your emperor won't have any reason to suspect", Athelstan says quietly. "Not from signs on your body."

His body language is another matter.

[thewidewideworld]

He nods slowly, still unsure. He does pull but slowly and carefully, trying not to look as shaken as he feels. "I would be very grateful if you could ease the pain, at least. And heal the parts of me more damaged."

[sunbaked_baker]

"I can do that," she nods, trying to reassure him. "It should only take a few minutes, though I will need to be touching you."

Rae holds her hands out, palms up. "You will be in no danger from me. I will just need to hold your hands during the healing, if that is all right. Athelstan will be here for you, as well."

[athelstanthescribe]

"I'm not going anywhere", Athelstan agrees. "And you can call a halt at any time, if you need to."

[thewidewideworld]

"My injuries- the worst parts of me are... intimate. Not a sight for a lady." There's hesitation in his voice, pain too.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae shakes her head slightly, leaving her hands outstretched. "I do not need to see them; I just need contact with your hands."

[athelstanthescribe]

"Is it permitted for me to touch while this happens?" Athelstan asks both Sinric and Rae, for different reasons. "Or would it interfere?"

[thewidewideworld]

Sinric nods and reaches for Athelstan's hand in a very deliberate gesture. Today isn't a good day for him, the nightmares were bad and wants to pull away and hide. It's an effort just to keep himself in the room with them. But for Athelstan, he makes the effort.

[sunbaked_baker]

"It won't interfere, no," Rae shakes her head slightly. Her hands, gently cradling Sinric's other hand, are warm and soft. They smell of the kitchens, baking scents and good food, and of the forest outside.

From the point of contact between them, warmth spreads, like the feeling of slowly lowering oneself into a perfect bath after a long day. Aches ease, soreness fades, stiff muscles relax, wounds heal. Injured flesh begins to find its way right again, then injuries being undone.

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan keeps his touch gentle and unforceful, his hand lightly on Sinric's, fingers stroking his knuckles.

"It's going to be all right."

[thewidewideworld]

The sensation of healing, deep within the core of him, is overwhelming and he pulls away very suddenly, staggering back a step or two.

A sob wells in his throat and he gasps, hiding his face in his hands.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae lets him pull away, gasping. She has never had healing interrupted before, and leaves her shaken and disoriented. "Oriens, what..."

She quickly notices his distress, though, and asks in hurried concern. "Are you alright? It shouldn't hurt..."

[athelstanthescribe]

"I don't think it was hurt, as such", Athelstan says softly in an effort to reassure her she didn't do any harm, his hand fluttering above Sinric's shoulder. "Oriens..."

[thewidewideworld]

Sinric shrinks away from Athelstan's hand, breathing fast. The sudden attack of panic pulls at him, making his eyes wide.

He turns, meaning to run for his room but he bumps hard against the table, upsetting a jug of water.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae's normal reactions would have allowed her to catch it - her magic moves along the speed of thought - but her disorientation from the backlash means her attempt to catch the jug only sends it off the table completely.

"I'm sorry," she insists, distressed by Sinric's panic, trying to stay clear of him for fear of making it worse. "I'm so sorry."

[athelstanthescribe]

"You meant only to help." Athelstan is keeping back as well, not trying to touch Sinric again. "He... has better days and worse days."

[thewidewideworld]

Sinric curls up in a ball in the corner, shaking. He crams his knuckles against his mouth, trying to stifle another sob.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae is at a loss. "What can I do? How can I help?"

How can she undo what she unwittingly did?

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan crosses the room to crouch by Sinric without touching, looking up at Rae with sympathy.

"Come and talk to him? Help me soothe him. Oriens, try to breathe evenly."

[thewidewideworld]

He's breathing too fast, too shallow. He pushes against the wall, needing to feel the hard wood protecting his back.

He had hear Athelstan but his words seem to come from a long way off. Too far away.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae doesn't approach, too afraid of crowding the stricken Oriens or somehow making things worse.

"Oriens, I'm sorry," she says, insistently. "I was being as gentle as I could, but I didn't know how overwhelming it might be for you. I..."

What could she offer?

"I don't know if you'd be all right with it, but if it would make it easier, you could sleep through the healing? That is how many medical procedures are done in my world - especially those that might cause panic. Healers simply put the patient to sleep temporarily. You would feel nothing, and simply wake up whole and unhurting. Like waking up after a good night's sleep."

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan disappears into the other room and comes back with an empty linen bag, which he drops gently over Oriens' hands.

"Hold that to your mouth and breathe into it. It will help."

[thewidewideworld]

It takes long moments for Athelstan's words to reach him before taking the bag and breathing into it.

It's long moments before he could breathe evenly enough think, let alone speak.

He can't. He can't be helpless again. He can't have hands on him. He just can't. He shakes his head, pulling away a little further.

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae sees a pitcher and pours Oriens a cup of water, approaching slowly - afraid she might upset him more - to leave it just within his reach.

[athelstanthescribe]

"Thank you, Rae", Athelstan says, quiet but warm, doing all he can not to make her feel worse about the situation. "Oriens, do you need to lie down in your room?"

[thewidewideworld]

He takes the glass after she sets it down. He takes a sip that turns into a gulp.

He coughs, chokes, covers his mouth as tears stream down his cheek. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

[sunbaked_baker]

Rae kneels down so she isn't towering over him, concern and guilt on her face.

"Slowly, slowly," she advises, as he coughs from gulping the water. "There's nothing to be sorry about."

[athelstanthescribe]

Athelstan reaches out and very lightly rests his fingertips on Sinric's hand, hoping to soothe by his presence without anything like a heavy touch.

[thewidewideworld]

Sinric fights not to pull away from Athelstan. His mind rails against his fears, the one out of balance with the other. "I can't- it's too much."